Life as we know it

"We did not choose to grow up,

Its a process in life where it will take away

your happiness and joy slowly"

Funny how when we were kids, we can't wait to grow up. Once we've grown up,

we wish to go back to when we were kids. Perhaps the stress of having a responsibility took

our judgement to a whole new level. It is a burden that everyone will have. Each is unique to every individuals.Without noticing, our happiness and joy will be sacrificed in this process called growing up.

You can't really play around and enjoy time with your family and friends. Your mind will be full of

unsettled problems. Health will become an issue. Money is all you want and everything else doesn't seem to matter.

I've seen people who actually became addicted to something more addictive than drugs. The name is money.

Parents fighting in front of their children just because of some financial problems. People say "You can't have everything". For money, I have lost the passionate feeling of being loved by my parents and being around family. I no longer know the feeling of bonds between family members and this place called home is just a place for me to sleep and shower. There is no warmth in this place. It all started 4 years ago.

It is a bitter memory of mine. My childhood differs from others. During this period, I no longer taste home made meals and eating alone is the thing I do most. It was better when my sisters were still around, but as they took a step closer to their dreams, I am alone. I do not want my future children to experience the same thing I did. I suffered a lot and I don't want them to suffer like how I did. 

Moving on...

"A promise is something you should keep, not break"

People often say that if you are unable to fulfill one's wish, never promise them. 

Promise is something that you are sure you can do and there is no way for you to not accomplish it.

A broken promise is like a broken trust. You're betraying someone's trust. I can relate to it as a broken bench. Once it's broken, you are unable to sit on it anymore. It hurts knowing that a person you trust didn't keep his/her promise. Because of the high hopes and expectations you've put in, it breaks your heart into a thousand pieces. For that, my friend, that person will never trust you again. Once you've been hurt, you'll not give 100% that you have to anybody. Its a simple state of mind. Will you go back to something that hurt you? For an example, if a dog bit you, will you ever go and pet it on the head as if nothing ever happened?

I don't think so. That is why its hard regaining something that you once had. Thus, that will lead to one and only conclusion.

"What you have now won't stay the same forever,

some might be lost, some might move on,

some you can never regain. 

Cherish things you have now,

there is no use of regret once its lost forever."